Well snoozy all week! Couldnt really muster much exercise this week! Bet you im getting my period haha Monday had PT so the usual killer workout.. and tuesday morning i usually workout with my trainer in the gym which is normally over 1000cals but she had to fill in a class for someone so didnt end up doing much.. its hard now im so much fitter i cant just go jump on the treadmill and the bike and have a killer workout.. i get too bored!
Then i had training thursday and friday inthe city for work.. i normally go to the gym at the hotel but we got back too late and had to continue some of our work so didnt get time to gym! Just been busy and emotionally exhausted from all the shit going on surrounding my birthday. I should be working harder! Get my anger out but unfortunately it does the opposite effect! Makes me depressed and all i want to do is sleepa nd cram my face full of food!
I love the city! In another life i could have easily worked in there and lived there! This is what we are provided for morning tea! haha so hard to resist ham & cheese croissants! lucky theyre small!
This is nachos for lunch! made with grilled chicken and HOT salsa! oh boy! and pan fried Salmon with wasabi mayo for dinner! OMG it was so amazing!! i was a good girl and didnt eat the chips just the salad and most of the salmon! MMmmmm
So anyway.. due to the lack of exercise and the constant of shit food.. i havent really been in the best of moods.. oh yeah and the fact that everyone seems to think they can take their shit out on me.. i have been pretty down.. and feeling like a blob..
This is pretty much what i see when i look in the mirror.. obviously im not skinny by any means.. just that i see how much i have left to go and not how far ive come.. but im constantly trying to train my brain against running foul thoughts through my head.. but when i eat shit and dont exercise its almost impossible to hold them back.. You can whinge all you like about being fat and hating your body but thatll just make you fatter.. get up stop being a victim and make yourself strong! Get moving! create those endorphins and watch the weight drop off.. obviously its hard and you wont have good days all the time as you can see.. but push through it! Nothing worth doing is ever achieved easily.
I always say this but you have to think about the reason behind your weight gain.. when did you put it on? what was going on in your life at that point? extra weight is about security.. not feeling safe or comfortable so you need the extra weight to protect you.. like a big doona when youre watching a scary movie. Its the bodies defence mechanism in this day and age. Bad relationships.. bad situations that you feel you cant control.. something huge that happened.. and when youre losing the weight all the issues have to come up.. once you have dealt with the issue the weight will fall off! Obviously its food and lack of exercise.. but what turns you to junk food? For me its when i cant cope.. im too lazy or too tired to make a better choice and i just cant deal with everything thats going on it my head.. so i just stuff my mouth. Im one of those broken record types.. everything replays itself in my head.. EVERYTHING! what i have to eat..what are the girls doing.. whatre we doing this weekend.. who's birthday is coming up.. what time am i working tomorrow.. why would *insert name here* say that to me? i wonder if they think this.. i really want to go to the movies.. how can i budget that in?.. city this weekend.. what time will i gym.. i have to eat beforehand.. what am i going to eat..i have to wash my clothes.. oh i gotta do the meal plan and shopping list for this week.. BLAH! come on youre exhausted just reading that! haha so when im tired or down i cant think straight! so i have to turn my robot mode on! JUST FUCKING DO IT!! You'll feel better and you cant sulk your whole life!
My fool proof formula..
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